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Words of Wisdom

Leadership Lesson Learned from Enzo, the Dog

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Here’s why I will be a good person. Because I listen. I cannot speak, so I listen very well. I never interrupt; I never deflect the course of the conversation with a comment of my own. People, if you pay attention to them, change the direction of one another’s conversations constantly. It’s like having a passenger in your car who suddenly grabs the steering wheel and turns you down a side street.

For instance, if we met at a party and I wanted to tell you a story about the time I needed to get a …

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Finding Focus to Finish the One Thing

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There are so many things I need to do but find that I get distracted so much easier than I ever have before.  I lay out all the things I need to finish that one project that must be done by tomorrow and next thing I know I’m looking at my Washington Post horoscope for the day and then I’m looking for the book I told a client I’d send her and then I’m looking for the invite to the wedding I didn’t respond to…ARGHHHH!  

No wonder I get exhausted!   

I’ve been in conversations recently to find ou…

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How to Stop Saying “I Don’t Know” When You Do Know

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Listen carefully to yourself for the next 24 hours. Pay attention to how many times during this period you say out loud “I don’t know”.  You might be surprised. I know I was when I tried this.  

  • Where do you want to eat?  
  • What movie do you want to see?  
  • What do you want?  
  • What’s next for you in your career?  
  • What do you want to achieve over the next X amount of time?  
  • What do you want out of your life? 

Your response to the above questions and many others when anyone gives you …

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Practice the Pause

One of the most critical learnings for leaders is self-awareness. Self awareness is defined as the “conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires.” How you behave and respond to external situations is governed by internal mental and emotional processes. Self-awareness uncovers thought-patterns, feelings and habits. Knowing your own operating system can lead to better decision-making and behavioral responses. When we focus on ourselves, we are able to evaluate and com…

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To Question or Not to Question…That is the Question.

“If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on the solution, I would spend the first 55 minutes determining the proper question to ask for once I know the proper questions, I could solve the problem in less than five minutes.” - Albert Einstein

In the work I do helping leaders learn more about conversational intelligence, I frequently get the question “Won’t asking questions at meetings make me look as if I don’t know what’s being discussed and make me look stupid?”

I always thou…

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7 Tips to Bring Compassion to your Work

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"The value of compassion cannot be over-emphasized. Anyone can criticize. It takes a true believer to be compassionate. No greater burden can be borne by an individual than to know no one cares or understands." ~Arthur H. Stainback

I spent a lot of my career in the business world working for someone as an employee. From the very beginning, I took great pride at being very professional. I was educated and programmed (yes, I said programmed), to always think and act like a "professional."

This w…

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12 Life Lessons I Learned from the Director of the Best Motion Picture of 2015

In 2015, Boyhood won the best motion picture Academy Award, Golden Globes, BAFTA, AFI and several others.

Photo by IFC Films - © IFC Films

What made this picture worthy of all these awards is that it was a groundbreaking story of growing up as seen through the eyes of a young boy who literally grows up on screen. It was filmed over a 12-year period with the same cast. In my heading down a rabbit hole on the Internet, I recently watched a video interview of its director Richard Linklater with J…

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What Women Want

There’s been an interesting conversation circling around me lately on what women want in their work environment that is an indicator of support from men.

With the #MeToo movement as well as the gender pay gap conversation shamefully still occurring, and the problem of like hires like, many organizations are looking at what do women want as support. In May, my friend and business associate, Linda Holroyd, of fountainblue and the “When She Speaks” leadership events, hosted an interesting panel di…

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6 Phrases Women Say that Give Away Our Power

I work with many women who say they want to find their voice. They want to have input at the table. They want to appear confident and competent. I’ve found that sometimes it is what we do not say that is more powerful than what we do say.

I’ve learned that women must stop saying certain things that when said, have the impact of giving power away. Power in this context simply means “ability to do or act; capability of doing or accomplishing something.”

The first step to giving your power away …

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“What You Mutter Matters”

I sat at my desk this morning savoring my first cup of coffee watching the day get lighter and lighter with the sunrise. I was ready to begin my morning work ritual. I looked at my daily calendar that still displayed yesterday’s date and saying:

MON APR 02 do your work.

Not very exciting. I got a bit excited thinking of today’s message, as today is my birthday. I was expecting some amazing words of wisdom from my calendar that would tell me what was important in my new birth year. It would be …

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